I’ve become rather portly in my young age, and lately as I’ve been buying new frocks for work, I noticed something. I AM AN ENTIRE SIZE LARGER THAN NORMAL. I thought to myself, “f this” and:
I joined a running club.
This running club. From now on, I am Cogsy, Winter Warrior.
Fun Factor: most likely -80
I found out how many people in the U.S. have my name.
According to the site, there are “one or fewer people” with my name in the country! Sweet.
You can find out for your own name, here.
One of my dad’s lame jokes is actually somewhat usable in this situation…
Me: I’m really glad my parents named me Shea.
Me: Because that’s what everyone calls me!
Fun factor: 7
Tonight I am sitting at home relaxing. Nothing planned, not too many immediate stresses. We have no beer or drinkable wine in the house, so how about a cocktail? With virtually no liquid mixers, I was forced to be creative.
I invented a cocktail.
The epicurean ingredients:
The end product:
RECIPE: one shot cheap vodka, 6 oz. water, 2 teaspoons Country Time dry lemonade mix, a pinch of desperation, a dash of maraschino cherry juice (from jar), 3 maraschino cherries. Mix. Drink. Wince. Wish you had friends.
Fun factor: 8
Last night I worked at my waitressing job, because I love being a waitress and working numerous jobs. In any event, last night was a first as:
I served tables with no electricity.
There was some sort of power outage for a few of the blocks surrounding the restaurant, and for most of the night the power company was able to allow us to run on half power, which managed to make us feel more cozy than anything. Our stove tops are gas, so the guys were able to keep cooking. Then the entire place went black for a while. My clients and I amused ourselves by channeling Bloody Mary through the bathroom mirrors. I can’t be certain but at one point I think I spotted a looter behind the counter chugging Pellegrino.
Fun factor: 4
I ordered “something”.
I visited this website that sends you something for $10. I can’t wait to see what I get! Check back for updates.
Fun Factor: 10
My dad has been known to send me newspaper clippings, letters, “holiday cash” and other random things in the mail. This week was a first- he sent me a chain mail letter, so:
I took part in a book exchange via snail mail.
Thanks, Frank. I had instructions to send to one of my dad’s friends a paperback that I have read. I hope Bob enjoys his copy of Me Talk Pretty One Day. I also sent my dad a copy of Proctology for Dummies.
Here’s the chain mail note:
Note my father’s personal note reads: “Just do it you big baby!” Such an encouraging voice he has. If you find yourself squinting- it’s not an illusion- it’s written in hieroglyphics.
Fun factor: 5